April 14, 2010

The Tale of Big Toothie

The Tale of Big Toothie
Comprised of Five Word Poems by Minnie Molly Mary
Photo-journalism by David Magnolia Ficke
Sangria provided by S. Sandrigon
And a Special Appearance by Darren Southworth Peoples as the outlaw Rocky "Antibiotic-Resistant" Goner-realism
Five Nights Only!
Free Hair Tonic & Cold Sore Eradication thrown in for parties of five or more.

The Tale of Big Toothie
Part I.

big toothie was a thug

he resembled a good-looking dolphin

both parents were feral mathematicians

big toothie always wore white

especially with tooth-fairy on sunday's

they would jump chain-link fences

tooth-fairy laughed at big toothie

big toothie shook his fist

"i'll get you my pretty!....

if the jellyfish don't first"

Part II.

big toothie threatened death often

fortunately the jellyfish never obliged

child services watched them constantly

Part III.

big toothie rocked the party

oftentimes his bow-tie strangled him

instead of crying he choked

this he did not like

big toothie has low tolerance

"off with this accoutrement immediately,

bow-tie's disturb the chest halo...

and this little shirt, too!"

teeth have nipples, everyone wondered?

"what do they taste like?"

tooth-fairy raised her hand first

"they taste like vegan haggis!"

Part IV.

big toothie wanted to murder her

he was a reasonable tooth

conversely, pixies were riotous cheerleaders

tooth-fairy's parents sported grog blossoms

mother wore christmas ass-less chaps

father was a rhinestone cowboy

Part V.

big toothie got a cavity

"curses to all the truffles....

beastie evil fairy perversed me

tooth fairy's had rich taste

"screw dental hygiene" says she

"WELL, it's MY calcium appendage!"

fairy's liked corrupting god's gifts

afflicted, big toothie played dead

unfortunately, sleeping gives cavities strength

being an alcoholic doesn't help

"an inevitable dr. death visit!"

Part VI.

doctor's office smelled of warthogs

dr. death wore air jordan's

his parents were tight rope hula-hoopers

his handlebar moustache was frosted

sadly the prognosis was negative

"this chunk here must go!"

(speaking of the right nipple)

"refusal would mean impending gangrene"

to be continued!!??

No comments: