February 07, 2009

Beards We Know, Part One: Special February Mustache Month Edition, Focus on Sierra Nevada Mountains

In our new segment in the Department of Beards, Beards We Know, we'd like to highlight a few of the beards we got to know in the Sierra Nevada Mountains. In honor of February Mustache Month, I've tried to include a picture of the beard next to it in its mustache formation. I must note sadly that, like mine, many of these beards have now left us.

Mr Tomas, gambler & world traveler, cofounder of the Mimosas Witnesses, showcasing his Red Revolutionary Beard next to his Turkish Mystic mustache. Very nice.

Martineau, quite handsome in just a mustache...

& also in his shaggy mountain look (here pictured with Mr Quill & Herr Liebwiener.)

Mr Hermann, band promoter & Obama caucus organizer, the kindest soul, native of Naples, Vermont, where even the young girls have beards.

Mr Ficke, the angels still sing of your facial hair. Just yesterday, in the cold gutters of Santiago, you posted this memo on the facebooks:

Beard v. Chile. Chile VICTORIOUS.
Yes, Mega-Beard #2 has taken leave of my face. I granted its freedom last night after I couldn´t shake the thought... ¨wait, why do I still have this beard?¨ At first I was just gonna trim, but you get few beers in me and I tend to start shaving things. This time, there is no photographic evidence of the process, but ohhh, there´s nothing like it. Using tiny scissors to take chunks out of something that has been lounging on my visage for about 6 months now.. holding the gnarly ball of red, beholding the glorious ¨butt chin¨that has been in seclusion for so long. As Eva Freeman would put it, I´ve reverted to ¨Nakey Bum-Face¨. Once again, it was astonishing to discover how small my face really is, and how much I lstill look like that high school marching band picture my mom has framed upstairs. Freaky.

My main ammo for provoking /shocking passersby in South America is gone. But I still secretly snicker at the disturbing proliferation of mullets. My god, man, I´ve discovered the nexus of the next mullet uprising, and I believe it to be a combined effort of Chile and Argentina. When traveling solo, you quickly realize one steadfast truth--you have TIME. Ever feel like you don´t have enough time in the day? Buy a one way ticket and go somewhere alone. Time will become, depending on your level of creativity and willingness to explore, your friend or your bane, but most likely a poignant combo of both. My point is, you develop little habits, or create games. One of my favorite pasttimes quickly became ¨Mullet Tabulation¨. There aren´t really any rules or points or winning, but beer is definitely recommended.


So, instead of feeling slightly insecure in Latin America about my monstrous beard, now I´m self-conscious of the void hovering about my grill. It´s cool though, as I think that, maybe, quite possibly, a girl yelled (in Spanish) something that perhaps could be translated as ¨call me!¨

Sometimes its the random comments from passing cars that count the most.

1 comment:

Seth said...

I love this article. Rolling Stone started as a zine, and It Was Los is way more posh, and polished.

thank you for making my day a bit more happy and for giving an old friend something to smile and laugh at, and be merry about.