February 06, 2008

Correspondences: Epistle to S. Amidong, February 2008 Edition

Date: Wed, 6 Feb 2008 12:51:13 -0800 (PST)
From:"James Henry Welschg" <_@itwaslost.org>
Subject:[Sensitive Material]
To:"Samuel Tear Amidong" <_____@gmail.com>

Hi Sam,

I ordered your new album on Amazon, but stupidly put it in the same box as the darjeeling limited pre-order, so I won't get them till March Tenth. Can a man wait a month for these things?

Gossip? I'm single, James is going to Bulgaria with the peace-corps, Liam quit his recycled paper office-job & is planning on going to Fez, Virtue's going to take a month to regroup in New Mexico, I applied to u.c. berkeley. I know you don't like to ever tell me any details about your private life, so I just make stuff up & tell that to other people.

Music? I'm a bigger youtube star than you, with the exception of saro, which doesn't count because of your "fan base", which is mostly homeless sheep-[shaggers].

Politics? Whoo! Obama should do well in Louisiana, Washington, & the Chesapeake Bay region, right? I committed voter fraud by accident yesterday by voting on a "Non-Party Democrat" ballot, even tho I'm registered Green. GrĂ¢ce "Rat-Arse" Marlier & her fiancee stood for hours in Brooklyn with their hand-printed Obama posters. You can buy her shirts here: http://www.cafepress.com/glasshorse

Love? A beautiful dream.

Money? The stock market's down, which doesn't affect your fan base, including me.

Art? Abstraction is dead! Collage & montage are way-dead! Tell everyone!

Literature? Has been replaced by political blogs.

The Housing Crises? I still live in my classy apartment in Berkeley, you've moved to Hell's Kitchen. There's more flowers & cacti in Berkeley, & just as many crazy people.

That's the report, February 2008. Happy Burns Day / President's Day / Groundhog Day / Super Tsunami Tuesday / Hallowe'en,


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