I wrote these Joycean alternate lyrics to The Dying Californian (from the Sacred Harp, pg. 410t, music by Ball & Drinkard, 1859) outside La Val's Pizza on Durant.
When you'll write I never can tell.
Eat & think hard, bawl & drink hard,
I survive alive & well.
Cain't harass, her donkey's quirkley,
Natural gas our bodies expel.
Educate her issue, pink card,
Damn Lord Clive, alive & well.
Sixty-five & quell the turkley,
When we fight, I never do swell.
Soon you'll miss me in your berth-tard,
Still I thrive, alive & well.